Friday, November 5, 2010

Day 3 of boot camp

I just finished my first letter to Josh. I don't have an address yet, but when I do I'll have several envelopes to put in the out box right away. Also, I'll pass it on to you too, if you want to write to a young man serving his country, I know he'd appreciate getting letters during the old fashioned "mail call."

My boy's only been gone for 3 days and I'm ready to have him come back home. I know..."But Brenda, he has to go out & make his way, become a man, realize his dreams, earn his living, train, be successful & independent....you raised him to be that way..." I hear that every day from my girlfriends.

Cowboy Josh training for boot camp at 2 years old!

Listen, trust me, there is no one on this planet more proud of him than I am, I will bet my LIFE on it, but it's harder than I thought it would be. I'm not whining, I'm just feeling. I know this is part of the process of letting him go. 

I just want him to come home for 5 minutes, OK, maybe 20 minutes, have a cup of coffee with me, tell me all about boot camp (all 3 days of it) and then I can take him back to the airport. What? Is that too much to ask? I will tell you one thing for certain. As God is my witness, I will move mountains to be able to see my son. No one will come between us when I get a chance for a visit so step back people! Mama bear is growling!

RAAAAAWWWRRRRR!!
 

Where in the world did all of the years go?


Rest assured, I will have to be on life support for me to not be able to spend time with my child -------> when he, and some day his wife invites me to visit. Until the day I die, I promise you that. I just had to put that out there in the universe as my daily affirmation. Thanks for listening   :o)

I'm missing Josh today, that's all. I'll be fine later, I'm sure of it. Josh & I have been used to having our little chats every day or just short text messages passed back and forth. I've become accustomed to the close contact we've had for years...even if we just texted "Goodnight ~ I love you" there wasn't a day we didn't have some kind of connection. Not to mention the days we were trying to choke each other to death, ha! I pick up my phone 50x a day and want to shoot off a "HI Son! What's going on??" It's so unnatural, the silence is deafening.


I get so emotional when I look at this photo. Josh was waiting for his recruiter to pick him up to take him up to Ft. Meade to ship to boot camp (we met him up there the next morning). He was so anxious and must've looked out the window 500x looking for the van. I had flashbacks of his first day of Kindergarten. I know....I'm a big dork. But I couldn't help it. The days dragged, but the years flew.



Finally, Josh's awesome recuiter, Sgt. Nurse arrived to take him to Ft. Meade. Sgt. you'd better take care of my boy or I'll hunt you down. I can do some damage. Maybe not with my right arm, but the left one is super strong! You should be very, very scaaaaared.

"Bye Josh! Be good. Be safe! I looooove you!"  HOOO-AH!!

 
I'm really missing the goof ball today, can you tell? 
 


Photobucket

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